that_one_yellow_blob's Xanga

You should read this!

Tue, 29 Jul 2008 21:43:16 GMT

One of the best Xanga entries I've ever read:

God's Grace Is Like a [Helium Balloon]

Friday, July 25, 2008

Fri, 25 Jul 2008 13:03:07 GMT

http://sarahchoco.blogspot.com

Excerpt from 'Suprised by Joy'

Thu, 17 Jul 2008 17:26:04 GMT

"I number it among my blessings that my father had no car, while yet most of my friends had, and sometimes took me for a drive. This meant that all these distant objects could be visited just enough to clothe them with memories and not impossible desires, while yet they remained ordinarily as inaccessible as the moon. The deadly power of rushing about wherever I pleased had not been given me. I measured distances by the standard of man, man walking on his two feet, not by the standard of the internal combustion engine. I had not been allowed to deflower the very idea of distance; in return I possessed "infinite riches" in what would have been to motorists "a little room."" -C. S. Lewis

Ahhhhh. Need I say more? <3

No compromise.

Sun, 06 Jul 2008 11:09:47 GMT

"In order to plant the gospel, we must take risks."
-K.P. Yohannan

In all honesty (God teach me to love.)

Thu, 26 Jun 2008 01:38:48 GMT

If I don't accomplish anything else in life, I have at least this one goal:

I want to become a mother.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but motherhood is somewhat degraded in our society where self-advancement prevails. But do people even realize its beauty, its timeless and sacrificial beauty. I never understood the notion of love until this summer. I still don't, but I'm getting closer to it. Love is painful, and not being able to love is also painful. The former is probably more painful, but I have yet to truly experience that life-long sacrificial love, reflecting God's love for us, that a mother displays for her child. I am so ashamed that I have not been a better daughter; if anything, I haven't been a good one even. I am selfish. I am inconsiderate. I am unnecessarily independent. I am stubborn. I'm glad I've finally realized - I am truly grateful that I have - because through it I've learned of the immense love my parents have for me. It isn't perfect; they're human like me. But it is the closest thing to unconditional. I am so touched and hurt. Hurt because I know that no matter how many times I stumble and fail them, they will always love me; and it hurts to even imagine the pain they will experience. It's not too late, I can still change. But I feel so helpless, not being able to return the kind of love they have for me. Unrequited love, she called it. For now, all I can do is to respond in gratitude. Less of me. I know that when my time comes, I will finally understand their heart, God's heart. And what greater reward is there? What has been my prayer for the last several years? What more can I live for, than to know God's heart?

I have found the paradox, that if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only more love. -Mother Teresa

I Asked the Lord

Mon, 16 Jun 2008 15:30:42 GMT

A good friend sent this song to me and I liked the tune, but didn't think much of it. Then the other day I listening to it and a few phrases caught my attention, so I looked up the lyrics. A good ol' stranger online provided these lyrics, a good friend/mentor sent me this song, and it's been most applicable and appropriate in my life right now. Oh, and it's a hymn. People don't listen to hymns anymore; I'm just starting to get into them. They're beautiful.

1. I asked the Lord that I might grow / In faith and love and every grace / Might more of His salvation know / And seek more earnestly His face

2. Twas He who taught me thus to pray / And He I trust has answered prayer / But it has been in such a way / As almost drove me to despair

3. I hoped that in some favored hour / At once He'd answer my request / And by His love’s constraining power / Subdue my sins and give me rest

4. Instead of this He made me feel / The hidden evils of my heart / And let the angry powers of Hell / Assault my soul in every part

5. Yea more with His own hand He seemed / Intent to aggravate my woe / Crossed all the fair designs I schemed, / Cast out my feelings, laid me low

6. Lord why is this, I trembling cried / Wilt Thou pursue thy worm to death? / "Tis in this way," the Lord replied / "I answer prayer for grace and faith"

7. "These inward trials I employ / from self and pride to set thee free / And break thy schemes of earthly joy / That thou mayest seek thy all in me / That thou mayest seek thy all in me."

힘내라

Sat, 31 May 2008 16:40:23 GMT

Be strong.

If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.
James 1:5

Vulnerable love is the most powerful form

Sat, 03 May 2008 19:59:36 GMT

“We're never so vulnerable than when we trust someone - but paradoxically, if we cannot trust, neither can we find love or joy”
Walter Anderson

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Wed, 23 Apr 2008 09:32:55 GMT

Ahhh.
What good are words
when they can't express
the deepest of emotions?

After silence, that which comes nearest to expressing the inexpressible is music.

Simple things

Sat, 29 Mar 2008 09:00:29 GMT

Quick break from working/studying:

It’s sunset time. I step out of Beverly Cleary, dressed in an overworn gray shirt and training shorts. My running gear. The first thing I notice is rain. This entire week has been sun and shine, and at the very moment I decide to get off my bed and do something physically productive, the sky decides to rain. On the other side of Channing Street, John waves. He’s finally back from spending his break at home (and abandoning us poor 4th floor kids… jk!). He asks if I’m going to RSF. I say maybe, because I hadn’t been considering it until he asked at that moment, and with the rain and all, it seems a reasonable option. But as soon as I depart, my feet are taking me away from RSF to the Berkeley campus. Very typical of them :)

I’m one of many people running in the rainy weather, surprisingly. And it just happens that one of the people I run past keeps staring at me as if thinking the same thing, ‘why the heck is she running in the rain too?’ I stare back, then decide to acknowledge our common experience by tossing at her a happy grin and an over-the-head thumps up sign. I must look funny, because with my other hand I’m holding up the phone against my ear. But she breaks into a smile, waves, then runs past me. She paces herself well.

The rain, the smile, the sweat. So simple. But they basically made my day.